A young cowboy in the Wild West dreamed of being the fastest gunfighter ever. He practiced day and night, but something just wasn’t clicking.

One night at the saloon, he saw an old man with a legendary reputation for being the fastest gun in the West. The cowboy bought him a drink and asked, “Got any tips for becoming the best?”

The old man gave him a quick look and said, “First thing’s first—your gun’s too high. Lower it a bit on your leg.”

“Will that make me faster?” the cowboy asked.

“Absolutely,” said the old man.

The cowboy lowered his holster, stood up, and—BAM—shot the bow tie off the piano player! 

“Whoa! Got any more tips?” the cowboy asked.

The old man nodded. “Cut a notch in your holster. It’ll make your draw smoother.”

“Will that make me faster?” the cowboy asked.

“Definitely,” the old man said.

The cowboy cut the notch, stood up, and—BAM—shot the cufflink off the piano player! 

“Okay, this is working! Got anything else?” the cowboy asked.

The old man pointed to a can of axle grease. “Smear that all over your gun.”

The cowboy went over and coated his gun in grease.

“No, no,” said the old man, “I mean all over—handle and all.”

“Will that make me a better gunfighter?” the cowboy asked.

“No,” the old man grinned, “but when Wyatt gets done playing the piano, he’s gonna shove that gun up your behind. And trust me, it’ll hurt a lot less if it’s all greased up.” Sometimes, the best tips are the ones you never saw coming!