A lawyer married a woman who had previously been divorced ten times. On their wedding night, she turned to her new husband and said, “Please be gentle, I’m still a virgin.”
“What?” said the baffled groom. “How is that possible after ten marriages?”
She sighed and explained:
- Husband #1 was a salesman—he kept promising how amazing it would be, but never actually delivered.
- Husband #2 was in software development—he wasn’t sure how it was supposed to work but said he’d troubleshoot and get back to me.
- Husband #3 was from field services—he ran all the diagnostics but couldn’t get the system up.
- Husband #4 was in telemarketing—even though he had the order, he had no clue when he could deliver.
- Husband #5 was an engineer—he had a complex plan but needed three years to research, design, and implement it.
- Husband #6 was in finance—he thought he could do it but wasn’t sure it was in his job description.
- Husband #7 was in marketing—he had great presentation skills but didn’t know how to position himself.
- Husband #8 was a psychologist—all he did was talk about it.
- Husband #9 was a gynecologist—all he did was examine it.
- Husband #10 was a stamp collector—all he ever did was… God, I miss him!
She then smiled at her new husband and said, “But now that I’ve married you, I know things will be different!”
“Oh yeah? Why’s that?” the lawyer asked.
**“Because you’re a lawyer. This time, I *know* I’m gonna get screwed!”*
