The Navy realized they had too many officers, so they came up with a special early retirement bonus:
$1,000 for every inch measured in a straight line between any two points on their body!
First officer steps up and says, “Measure me from the top of my head to my toes.”
Result? 6 feet = $72,000. Not bad!
The second officer gets clever. “Measure from my fingertips to my toes!”
Boom! 8 feet = $96,000. Even better!
Then comes a grizzled old Chief. When asked where he wants to be measured, he smirks and says:
“From the tip of my weenie… to my testicles.”
The pension officer tries to talk him out of it, but the Chief insists.
A medical officer arrives to take the measurement. The Chief drops his pants, and the doc starts measuring…
Then suddenly stops and says, “Uh… Chief… where are your testicles?”
The Chief calmly replies…
“Vietnam.”
